American Horror Story: “Bullseye” Review

Round and round and round it goes, and where it stops, nobody knows.

Spoilers ahead.

American Horror Story: Freak Show seems to have struck the mid-season rut with its most recent episode, “Bullseye.” I understand that not every episode is going to be a game-changer, but since every AHS season is self-contained, I am markedly disappointed by the barely-perpetuated story.

Bette and Dot are having a wonderful/terrible time at the Motts’ house as we gather from their diary-entry narration. While Bette remains happy-go-lucky about the situation and the attention that the “man-boy” Dandy is paying them, Dot remains suspicious of Dandy’s intentions, deciding to take advantage of the Motts’ money to save up for the surgery she dreams about. Dandy, meanwhile, is convinced he is going to marry the girls (as he feels “normal” with them), and though Gloria disapproves of this “fetish,” the twins are there to stay. I’ve got to admit that I’m forever amused at Gloria’s vocabulary; however, I’m beginning to think that Dandy’s temper tantrums might be past date. If he’s going to continue to kill people, as the end of the episode suggests, let’s just get on with it already.

Ah, young love.

Ah, young love.

Over at the Cabinet, it’s Elsa’s birthday week, which means presents and festivities. I mean, I’m content with spending my birthdays visiting Buffalo Wild Wings by myself, but I suppose that might be ruined too if I was trying to dispel rumors circulating among the people I care about (though I’ve never stolen conjoined twins to pawn them off to rich, neurotic socialites). After a long speech that will probably win Jessica Lange an Oscar, Paul displays the trust and faith the “freaks” have in Elsa by strapping himself to “the Wheel.” The third knife misses (hits?) its mark, landing in Paul’s stomach. Fitting, given his outward skepticism about Elsa’s insistence that she had nothing to do with Bette and Dot’s sudden disappearance. I thought that perhaps Freak Show might have killed off Paul after spending more time with him in “Bullseye,” but it looks like we’ll have to wait until next week to find out his fate.

Happy birthday, you crazy woman.

Happy birthday, you crazy woman.

Oh, and Stanley is still forcing Maggie to obtain a “freak.” This week’s target is Ma Petite, but Maggie isn’t able to go through with drowning such an adorable human being. Stanley gets angry, but that’s about it.

I’m not sure what significance Paul’s girlfriend Penny might have past her role in this episode as a plot point to kindle Elsa’s jealousy, and I’m forever turned off by the weekly musical number (though this week’s is non-anachronistic, so that’s a plus), but the largest fault with “Bullseye” is its lack of forward momentum. Round and round and round it goes, and indeed, American Horror Story: Freak Show is spinning its wheels.


  • Quote of the Week: “Now I demand that you start having fun this instant!”
  • Other Quote of the Week: “Dandy, I brought you snackies!”
  • One More Quote of the Week: “It’s like when I had tuberculosis and you took me out to the Utah desert.”
  • I would watch a cooking show called Kathy Bates Bakes a Cake.
  • RC Cola, what a treat!


  1. Jim November 16, 2014
    • Jared Bohlken November 16, 2014

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